That Was God

I was at a red light and turned right. Everything looked foreign to me. I had been on this road hundreds, maybe even thousands, of times, yet I didn’t know where I was.

I petitioned God and started to make deals. “God, help me! God, don’t take her today! God, she is so young and has so much to do yet! Please, I beg you. Don’t take her! Take me! If you want, just take me. Right here, right now—take me! Not Megan. I am here. You can have me. She has so many more lives to touch. I am ready! I am yours!”

I meant it. Who wouldn’t put their life down in place of their child’s life? Or even their spouse’s? I remembered the verse from John 15:13: “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.”

Then Russ broke through, and I heard him on the phone: “Mrs. Hipszer.”

“Yeah.”

“The policeman wants to talk to you.”

“Okay. Hello?” I got excited. Great! I can get some solid answers! I thought.

“Hello. I understand you are Megan’s mother,” he said pointedly.

“Yes. Please, tell me, how bad is she? Where is she? I have to get to her. Where do I go?”

“Mrs. Hipszer, we need some information from you so we can help Megan. Can I put the paramedic on the phone to ask you some questions?” He totally ignored my questions. Didn’t he understand? The sooner he got me there, the sooner I could answer his questions and the sooner I could help my baby.

“Yeah,” I answered, now understanding how very important this was. This person was going to help heal my girl.

“Is Megan on any medications?” the paramedic inquired.

“No, she is very healthy.” So there! She is strong and can get through this!

“Does she have any allergies?” he asked next.

“Yes, she is allergic to penicillin and strawberries.”

“Okay, thank you. I have to get back to help your daughter now. Okay? I am going to put the policeman back on with you,” he stated hurriedly. Silence.

But wait! Oh, man! He just left me too.

“Hello again,” the policeman said with a groan.

“How bad is she?” I pleaded. “Where is she? How do I get there?”

He inquired, “Where are you now?”

I looked around as I was still driving. “I don’t know exactly. I am on my way to Russ’s house, but I am not sure where I am right now.” I hoped he could see me through some kind of magical lens and give me directions. “I don’t know where to go! Just tell me how to get there!”

I started to panic, and very calmly, he said, “Mrs. Hipszer, you need to pull off the road and call a friend. Do you have family who can come get you?”

“No! I need to get to Megan!” I screeched.

“Mrs. Hipszer, the helicopter is landing now, and they will be taking her to the trauma center,” the officer said emphatically. “Meet her there. They will be putting her on the helicopter very shortly.”

“Oh, my God! It is that bad?” I cried out. “She needs the helicopter?” Then I appealed to my God again, “Oh, my God, help her! I have to get there! I have to call my husband! Help us!”

In a commanding voice now, the police officer sad, “Mrs. Hipszer, please do not come here. Please meet Megan at the trauma center.”

“But I have to go with Megan! I don’t know how to get there. She can’t be by herself! She needs me, and I need to go with her. I don’t know where the trauma center is. I don’t want her to be all alone!” I was crying in pain and panic.

“Mrs. Hipszer, I have to go help with Megan. I will see you there. Please stop driving and call a friend to take you there.” He may have been a little impatient at that point. I, on the other hand, was sure I had control! Not!

“I am sorry. I can’t talk anymore,” I said. “I have to call my husband and find Megan.” With that, I hung up on the policeman.

I looked around and thought, Okay, I can do this. I can find my way.