Don’t ask yourself what the world needs.
Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and go do that.
Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.
—Howard Thurman
Chapter 1
The Broom Star
There was a star danced, and under that was I born.
—William Shakespeare
Call me Xing. My story began when I was four years old. One night, I saw a big, bright object flying across the dark sky. Immediately, I ran to Mother, pulled her hand, and exclaimed, “Mama, come! I saw a falling star with a bright, long tail!”
“Oh, a comet,” Mother remarked, shaking my hand off. “In Chinese, we call it a Saoba Xing. Its big, long tail, like a saoba [broom], sweeps all luck away. Just like you.”
You can imagine how quickly my excitement died, and I had nothing else to say. I, Saoba Xing, am a bad omen, named after a broom star? But I do not blame her now. How could I expect Mother to love me when she had never been loved?
“I was arranged to marry your father when I was only sixteen!” Mother would say. But I have never seen my father. All rich men shared the same fate back in those days, and if I kept on asking, Mother would say, “Your father lost everything and died the same year that you were born. Saoba Xing! What more do you want to know?”
There were a lot of things I did not know. But one thing I knew was that because of me and the bad omen I brought, my mother was asked to leave the village. Carrying me on her back, she somehow managed to find a lowly job in a city far, far away. But she never remarried, and I believed Mother would have been better off if I had never been born.
“That’s not right! It’s not your fault that your mother suffered so much!” Yes, I have heard it said enough, but Mother was all that I had. Life continued to be difficult, and it was then she started playing mahjong. Luck is important to a gambler, and when there is no money, it is easy to blame others.
“My friends are coming for a game,” Mother said. “And why are you playing with that broomstick again?” Mother snatched the broom out of my hand and shouted, “Saoba Xing! How many times do I have to tell you? Do not sweep my luck away! Now go to your room. Now!”
I still remember that day—how I wanted to grab the broomstick back and fly away. But that didn’t happen. Instead, I walked quietly to my room, closed the bedroom door behind me, and promised myself, “When I grow up, I will be a better mom. I will hug and kiss my baby. I will be nice and say kind words.”
***
I started kindergarten when I was five. On my first day of school, I learned a big lesson.
I have always loved apple juice and was thrilled to have the delectable drink for snack time. I quickly finished my first cup and excitedly asked for a second. But when I went back to the classroom, I needed to use the bathroom! Immediately, I raised my hand and waited, but my teacher did not see me. Within minutes, I could hold it no longer and made a puddle on the floor!
“Clean up your mess!” Teacher yelled as she tossed me a towel without looking.
Kneeling down, I grabbed the towel and dried the wet floor. Wiping my tears away with the back of my hands, I learned to clean up my mess quickly and quietly. When I did so, my teacher was quite pleased with me.
But I had not come into this world to be sad and miserable. As I grew, I found my secret paradise in books. I read Aesop’s Fables and found the Lion and the Mouse; I read One Thousand and One Nights and found Alibaba and the Forty Thieves. I also read the Bible and found Jesus and the wise men from the East! In fact, I loved reading so much that I dreamed of becoming a writer myself.
“Writers make no money, especially Chinese ones,” declared Mother. “I have never heard of a Chinese writer who can stay out of jail, let alone make enough money to provide a roof for their family. Xing, you have to understand that it is expensive to raise you. Study hard so you can get a good job. Be sure you make enough money to take care of me when I get old.”
Mother was proud of me when I chose to go to college to get a vocational degree at eighteen. And I too was relieved because I was eager to find out what the world had in store for me.