What you are about to read is not a horror story or a fairy tale. It does contain numerous tragedies and stories of desperate love. It will get gruesome and graphic at times. I am sharing some of the worst things I’ve seen as a 20-year police officer and crisis negotiator. I felt these details were necessary to show you the horrible side of suicide to help prevent future ones. I will provide you with controversial reasons for the rise in completed suicides. I wrote this book to help first responders who are going through severe depression. I will help you understand the source of the depression and the way to restore your hope. I will also provide helpful tools for the family members, friends, coworkers, and supervisors of these first responders.
If you are contemplating suicide – I ask you to please stop whatever you’re planning. Take the time to read the entire book, and ask for help instead. You will find your hope again. You will find your purpose. Give the people who love you another chance to help you. Once you’re in a better, safer place you can use the tools in this book to help others survive too.
The stories I use in this book are real, so I have purposely used fake names in almost every case. The subject of suicide is so sensitive and full of stigma that I am hoping to protect their privacy. I don’t want to add any trauma to their lives. And even though the people who completed suicide can’t feel any more pain – their family and friends still do.
I will also explain the stigma faced by first responders who ask for help under current treatment options. We will discuss ways to overcome the barriers to getting real help. There is also information on how to set up faith-based peer support groups for those agencies who are looking to do more to help. These groups would be encouraged to work with family members, others who have survived depression, mental health counselors, and faith-based leaders to provide help on different levels.
If you aren’t a believer; I’m going to ask you to indulge me, and read this book anyway. Hopefully, you will pick up some good tools to put into your toolbox for that chaotic day when you need them. My goal is not to teach you how to negotiate with people you encounter on calls. You have experts for that. My goal is to give you the tools that you need to help someone you care about when they are having the worst day of their life. It could be a day when they have lost all hope and are subtly asking for your help. After reading this book, you will understand the scream for help that isn’t making it to their lips – because their mind won’t let it out. But you will hear it because you will know how to listen.
Watching someone die because I didn’t know how to help them was the most helpless and useless, I’ve ever felt. So please, read the whole book, keep an open mind, and remember the parts that you will need some day. Our goal is to stop suicide, one person who we love at a time.